Knock Me Down With a Flatbread

Fat chance of anything sensible coming out of the mouth of a leading politician these days, let alone words of wisdom that would inspire action, instil passionate belief or even convince you that they were telling the truth.

If it’s not excreting even more excruciating Brexit balderdash, then politicians from both main parties appear to be deep in the mire of mud-slinging, name-calling and blame dodging. Few straight answers and even fewer principled stances with anything approaching evidence.

So you could have felled the fat lad with a flatbread when he found that he admired, and could only be inspired by, Labour Deputy Leader Tom Watson’s revelation that he had lost SEVEN stone and seen off type 2 diabetes by changing his lifestyle.

A shudder of recognition rippled through the jelly belly in empathy with Watson’s confession that he felt frightened, ashamed and guilty when he finally faced up to the state he found himself in. Another fat dad terrified he wouldn’t see his kids grow up or be around to share those long-awaited twilight years with loved ones.

Only annoying thing is that he seems to have had the sense to grab that last chance almost ten years earlier than man mountain did, and he’s knocked me into a tub of lard when it comes to exercise - even taking up boxing.

Okay, hats off to the man, even if he is a politician, for showing it can be done.

Boosted by a return to the parkrun waddle on Saturday, the gigantasaurus was feeling pretty good himself this week but knew there was probably a kick in the very-much-lower stomach waiting around the corner at Tubby Towers.

Peering through fingers of fear rotundo stepped gingerly onto the scales only for them to reveal a very welcome three more pounds had tumbled down the mountain.